1:23 p.m. - 2004-03-31
But, I am too much of a lady to do that. Besides, that explosive pooping episoide last week nearly put everyone in my building out of commission. Permanently.
But, I would love so much to pick boogers, roll them into big green balls, and flick them at the people who are crawling up my ass because I'm leaving them to go on an 11 day cruise.
11 days! In total, 16.5 days work sober. I feel like I'm going to Betty Ford to get detoxed. I mean, goodness, I've already had the colon cleanse. Inadvertantly.
OK, enough about poop. I promise, I'm finished.
Ok, done now.
Hey, I read that book Save Karyn, and now I want loads of people to give me money to pay off my debt. Girl's brilliant. The closest I came to that idea was to sell my JOB on eBay, but as my boss informed me, it isn't really mine to sell, so I'd be doing all the work, for none of the profit. Damn!
But can you imagine? People giving you a dollar here, a cent there and paying off all your stupid I bought my ex-boyfriend an college education, toys to keep him from crying like a girl, and then bought every high end cosmetic out there to make myself feel better debt?
Yeah. That would be the life. I'd do it for someone else. A dollar. In fact, I'm mad because I wasn't in on the action last year when Karyn was begging for dough. But I did buy the book, so I feel like a benefactor of sorts. And I was much entertained. Karyn is very funny.
4.5 days and counting...