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2:46 p.m. - 2004-10-29
And the banjo played in Zenville.
Number 2:

The Devil came down to Georgia in my own backyard. While I was getting my blood sucked. I'm still shivering.

I went to my pre-op appointment this afternoon, where my doc told me he was going to whip out my uterus, roto-rooter it, then slap it back in, good as new. In those words.

That wasn't the scary part.

I went to do the blood and pee test, and the receptionists were drugged up on Jesus. I mean, they were having a relationship with the Lord that seemed unseemly. They kept screwing up my paperwork, because they were talking about how the movie Raising Helen touched them and made them want to pray in gladness. And they were a-praising the Lording, and amening so ferverently, they had to re-do my paperwork 6 times. And they talked REALLY slow... I heard banjo music.

Then one of them sucked blood out of my arm, handed me a pee cup and said to have a nice day.

This is not a Halloween story. This is my life.

Really.

Nothing against praying. I like praying. But surely God can wait until you get my paperwork done to extol his wonderfulness. He knows how you feel, trust me...


 

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