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12:13 p.m. - 2005-08-02
Stop running.
I went out for lunch (hot, sweaty, melty, blech...) and stopped by the bookstore for a nice cool drinkie of microbrewed iced tea. Wandered around for a bit, and saw that children's books were on sale.

I can see this is going to be a new obsession. I limited myself to two. I got "My First Book of Nursary Rhymes Jigsaw Puzzle Book" and "Curious George and Friends Favorite Stories" which indeed has loads of my own favorite stories, including the one where he wants the red balloon, and tries to pick it out, but ends up grabbing all of them and floating over the city.

If nothing else, the Neph will be well read, or have plenty of fuel for a bonfire.

I'm still only halfway through reading Harry Potter, and am noticing that on the nights I read in bed, I have wickedly vivid dreams that wake me up several times a night. I'll even have a full feature film legnth dream which seems to last hours, but wake up to find its only a couple minutes after the last time I woke up. My brain is moving so fast.

Needless to say, I'm waking up exhausted. So, I may be switching my nightly Harry Potter read for a bit of quiet yoga and meditation instead of the other way around.

Sleep is a wonderful thing. I want some of it.

Work has also been a bitch, working long hours because the day is so packed with meetings the only time we can have more meetings is in the early AM or late PM. Its temporary, until we get over this rough spot, but it still sucks elephant balls.

I'm definately getting some comp time for this. A martre I am not.

Off to get more water. I've been drinking like a camel on the other side of a desert trek with all this heat and ickiness.

My idea weather would include 60-75 degree weather year round, with a slight breeze, fantastic huge thunder storms now and then.

Here in the Mid Atlantic, we get pretty much everything there is to be had, but lately its been heat and humidity of equatorial proportions. At least that's how it feels to me.

Bring on autumn. Mild days, chilly evenings, the sound of falling leaves as I hike through the woods. The smell of wood fires, the color of the trees, men in flannel shirts, and sweaters coming out of storage to air off and become useful again on nippy days. Hiking boots oiled and newly laced. Picnics and camping without bugs in the later months. Apple cider, cinnamon and nutmeg in the air. Cozy dark evenings by the fire contemplating everything and nothing.

That's what I love. When I feel closest to my spirit and the beating of my heart. Autumn is full of potential, hope and the light within all of us that moves throughout the universe in one single hum.

In the winter I want spring, and in the summer I want fall. Maybe I should try being happy with the seasons as they come and not want to rush them along. There will come a day when I don't have many seasons left to celebrate, and I'll want them all - hot, cold, wet, crisp. I should feel that way now. Then in the end, I will have no regrets. I will have lived season by season, day by day. And I will feel that I lived, not just survived, or existed.

Something to meditate on...


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