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10:02 a.m. - 2006-04-25
Back to Zen.
Did I tell you about going to Neuro-Physical Therapists next week? Maybe I did. Anyway, I'm pretty darned excited. I've been put on a short regimine of steroids and strong muscle relaxers for a week to loosen me up to start therapy. I've noticed a huge difference. Lots of cracks, pops and adjustments are happening up and down my spine.

The weird thing is that once my lower back started loosening up, my upper spine started creating a painful sensation right between my shoulder blades, making my left shoulder numb, and sending shooting pain up my chest, through my ribs, neck and jaw. That only lasted a few hours though, so I think it was just more adjustments being made and a nerve getting pinched along the way. I lay down on the floor and it helped a bunch.

I consider this all good stuff. Its all progress toward a med free life and a better body condition overall. Physical therapy is going to rock. Then I'll probably get to go back to my gym and exercise like I used to before the tumor thing started up a couple years ago. That'll feel like me again. Its tough feeling like you don't fit into your own skin. It sucks. Not much longer though...

I've done up a good, solid budget and it looks pretty workable. One for now, one for after I get the loans processed.
I may survive this afterall. I just need to keep my travel expenses in check. Use savings (I start that in June) instead of putting it on credit. That may be the hardest part yet. But there are no cruises on the horizon yet, my doctor friend in LA is flaking out on me, and Ireland isn't until October/November.

I was considering a flight or two (expense shared with Max of course...) to Miami to visit on a Saturday, but with Max only getting 1.5 hours off the ship hit or miss a weekend, its not worth it. They are totally screwing him over, which he's not used to, given his extensive freedom on the ship I met him on. He had that staff eating out of his hand, and the captain was really relaxed. This ship is like prison. He's miserable.

The only good thing is that I save more money. Which, if given a choice, would not be my first priority. But, it is what it is. I miss him terribly. His expressions, his spontaneous singing, the teasing pinches on my waist while he pretends to ignore me, his soft, shiny face. His huge hands...

I'll stop there.

Oh well.


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