10:24 p.m. - 2006-06-22
I'm such a fucking freak.
I'm nauseous. Then blah. Then nauseous.
I bought the car today.
The car payments are slightly more than my rent.
I'm committed for 5 years.
My vagabond way of life is going extinct. Because I am now financially tied to a bank. And although I am also tied to credit card banks, this seems more real. I guess because something could be taken away if I blow it.
I can't just run off and live on a cruise ship now. That makes me sad.
I keep wondering if I did the right thing.
Is this in any possible way normal? Is this what other people feel when they buy a car, or a house?
God I wish I weren't alone right now. I want to be panicking with someone.
I'm sure I'll feel much better about this in the morning.
Or maybe not.
I miss my freedom.
